Christie for President, In Our Wildest Dream

Mayor de Blasio’s grown-up version of ringing Governor Cuomo’s bell and then running away almost overshadowed Chris Christie’s throwing his hat into the Republican presidential ring, swelling the field to 14 “name” contenders, assuming people haven’t forgotten who George Pataki used to be.

But since the presidential election is just 16 months away, while the de Blasio/Cuomo war figures to last at least through the 2017 mayoral election, it seemed like a good idea to wait for Mr. de Blasio to return from a vacation that may not have been as restful as originally planned—we hear they have working cell-phone service in the Southwest—and take the opportunity to interview the New Jersey Governor’s subconscious while he was otherwise occupied with trying to ensure he’s among the top 10 in the GOP polls and therefore eligible for the Fox debates. The following is how we imagine that Q. and A. might have gone: